Are You Alive Yet?

You are dead. Don’t worry too much about it because I’m dead, too.

Jesus left the land of the living to show us how to join him there. That’s what Christmas celebrates: Jesus leaving the land of the living, coming to earth, and showing us the way (actually acting as the Way) to the land of the living. So, right now, you are actually dead.

Are you confused yet? I am, too. However, one recent morning I had a moment of clarity. I focus so much of my life on living fully, being alive, making the most of my days, and so on. This is good. However, what if life is about more than now? What if right now is just the appetizer?

I make life about me so often. Sure I sprinkle in some God and good deeds periodically, but really it’s about me. However, what if I’m really just this little infant soul that’s slowly waking up? Having trust in Jesus’ ability to cleanse me from my sins and bring me into relationship with God, I do believe I’m alive. But I still feel so dead.

What if this life is really just preparing me for the true awakening that will come at the end of this life? I always look at Jesus’ crucifixion with great sorrow, but ultimately it led to amazing joy – probably for Him as much as for mankind. He woke up again. He reunited with His Father and made a way for me and you to do the same.

If that’s all true, why am I sitting here on my butt letting my life waste away? Why don’t I get up and do something awesome? Why don’t I act like I’m this infant about to be born into an amazing world and right now I get the opportunity to knowingly prepare myself? I get to choose to hiccup to build my lungs and to push against the uterine wall to strengthen and prepare myself for the great adventure that will come.

Perhaps a tragedy and sacrifice we overlook in the Jesus story is Jesus essentially dying just to take on flesh and become a man. As I type with Christmas music in the background, I’m lost in a whole new wonder of who this God-Man actually was and the amazing thing He did so I could have relationship with Him.

Are you alive yet?

Christmas Confusion

I am confused by Christmas. Maybe not all of Christmas, but definitely by the glitz and glam of American-commercialized Christmas. I know there’s a group of us every year asking, “What, really, is Christmas about?” This year brings the same echoing question to my mind.

In years past, my wife and I have attempted to get past the commercialism of the traditional American Christmas. We’ve urged our families to make gifts for one another rather than purchasing. When that didn’t pan out in the long term, we’ve attempted to be more intentional about our Christmas gift purchases. We’ve bought gifts such as TOMS shoes or donated money to great organizations in honor of a specific family
member.

This year I’m wondering what the balance is in participating in Christmas celebration with my family while simultaneously honoring God and serving those for whom life is a daily struggle of survival and Christmas is a far away dream in another world.

Working at a group home (I’m a chaplain at a home for abused and neglected children) can be an easy out to my troubling thoughts. It’s easy to simply tell myself that since I work with abused and neglected children I’m doing my part and I should just live the rest of my life however I want since I do my duty of service in the daily of 9 to 5. Honestly, this is tempting. Why not just float through Christmas lavishing impressive gifts upon family and friends with a clean conscience? But something inside won’t let me.

So what do I do with my struggle? I think I’m facing the reality that my struggle is a good one. Sometimes I might make frivolous choices in Christmas celebration, but my Christmas struggle helps keep me honest. In my typical celebration with family and friends I will continue to seek making an impact by the ways I spend my holiday time. I will invest more deeply in significant relationships around me (both with the kids I work with and close friends and family). I will continue to be a voice through my spending habits by purchasing products that make a tangible difference - like slave-trade free products.

Part of my job where I work is to oversee volunteer activities for our organization. At Christmas time I see many people who show up at our group home with a gift they’re donating and want to give it directly to the kid it’s for. Initially this sounds noble. I just want to see the joy the kid receives from my gift. But really, this type of giving is all about the person bestowing the gift. They are seeking a feeling. They want to feel warm and fuzzy inside and “these poor, abused children” are simply their avenue to obtain their “Christmas feeling.” I’m attempting to not be that person.

Now please don’t hear me wrong, we need donations and appreciate every gift and dollar donated. Every donation makes an impact. However, I’d love to see to that spirit of giving last beyond December 25th. I encourage those donating to such causes to make a commitment to be involved in the long term – not just in the Christmas season.

Likewise, part of my attempt to reject apathy this Christmas is to look for long term ways that I can make an impact. I’m sick of living a life where I’m simply seeking a warm, fuzzy feeling in exchange for the dignity of a fellow brother or sister via the façade of charity.

So my answer to the actual proposed question comes down to this: relationships. My rejection of apathy this Christmas is to focus on deepening relationships; both with those whom I love and whom God has called me to serve. I hope this will make an impact that last longer than the Christmas leftovers.